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  • feedwordpress 04:35:17 on 2018/06/16 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , , , Workplace, Yes   

    Stop Saying Yes When You Want to Say No 

    Most people hate saying no. Nobody likes the idea of disappointing others, but knowing when and how to say no is one of the most important skills you can cultivate. Done right, “no” can help you build better relationships and free you up to do the things that are important to you.

    Here are some ways to start building your ability to say that difficult word:

    Acknowledge that you can’t do everything.

    Trying to say yes to everything is likely to leave you trapped with no time or energy for yourself–and unable to give your best to any of your commitments. Start by selecting the things you genuinely want to say yes to–the things that build relationships with important people in your life, that align with your values, that bring you joy–and stop accepting responsibilities that don’t meet those criteria.

    Define your personal boundaries.

    Boundaries define the emotional and mental space between yourself and another person. Think of them as the gatekeepers of your personal space, and make sure that you’re clear about how much you’re able to take on. Setting boundaries, especially with people you care about, can be difficult and may make you feel guilty at first, but remember that caring for yourself helps assure that you have the energy to be there for others.

    Identify your priorities.

    To make good decisions about what to say no to, you need a clear idea of your own priorities. If you’ve left them undefined, sit down and spend some time thinking about what’s most important to you. Learning to prioritize effectively can help you become more efficient, save time, and decrease stress. Once you know what’s most important, it’s easier to decide where to focus your energy .

    Practice saying the words.

    Whether you’re declining an invitation to a party or turning down a new project at work, you can say no while still being friendly and respectful. Give yourself some ground rules and practice what you’ll say. Give a brief reason if you wish to, but don’t falter or back down. Be direct: “I’m sorry, but that’s not something I can take on now.”

    Never compromise on your integrity.

    Your integrity sets your standards and gives you a code of morality and ethics. Use it to guide you in saying no and you’ll always make consistent choices that are grounded in your beliefs.

    Know that you can’t please everyone.

    Trying to make everyone happy is a recipe for stress and frustration–and it’s literally impossible to do. You may fear that people will disrespect you or be disappointed if you say no, but most people won’t think any less of you. Remember too that in saying no you’re modeling good self-care to those around you.

    Here’s the bottom line: Knowing when to say no takes learning. Hone your skills so that you’re able to more easily recognize and deal with the situations where it’s your best response.

     


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post Stop Saying Yes When You Want to Say No appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 04:32:13 on 2018/06/16 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , , Workplace   

    6 Big Career Mistakes That Can Sabotage Your Future 

    If there’s one thing we all have in common, it’s that we all make mistakes–some because of inexperience, some because we don’t yet know what we know, and some, unfortunately, that we repeat again and again until we finally learn better. Mistakes are a natural part of learning, living, and leadership. But some mistakes can seriously sabotage your future. Here are a few to make sure you steer clear of:

    Mistake #1: Believing you have to know everything and do everything to be successful.

    To build a successful career, you definitely need to develop expertise in your field. But when you allow yourself to think you have to know everything and do everything, you’re setting yourself up to fail–plus you come across as a micromanager who doesn’t trust your team. Don’t sabotage your success by trying to know and do it all. Remember instead that the most successful people are those who are good at getting out of their people’s way and giving their team space to collaborate and get things done.

    Mistake #2: Thinking your leadership skills will develop naturally with time.

    You may be extremely competent in what you do, but if you don’t have any leadership coaching, mentoring, or guidance, don’t expect that whatever got you to your position will keep you there. If you’re in a leadership role, you need to be constantly honing your skills. As a leadership coach for top executives, I see this all the time–those who get promoted to prestige jobs don’t think they need any coaching. But leadership is a skill that requires constant nurturing and development. That may mean devoting some time each day to sharpening your skills, or taking a class, or hiring a coach to help you understand your strengths and weaknesses and build your confidence.

    Mistake #3: Falling prey to SOS (Shiny Object Syndrome).

    An ailment of distraction, Shiny Object Syndrome most commonly affects business people with an entrepreneurial mindset precisely because of the qualities that make them unique: They tend to be highly motivated, they crave new technology and new developments, and they aren’t afraid to start new projects and create new things. But if you’re constantly chasing after something, only to lose interest and start in on the next thing, you’re in danger of derailing your career. Once you reach a certain level, success isn’t about getting new opportunities but about getting the right opportunities. The more time you spend looking for something new, the less time you have to devote to becoming your best.

    Mistake #4: Putting your life on hold while you chase success.

    If you don’t have a life, you don’t have a career. Thinking that longer hours will make you more successful is a big mistake. It’s not the hours you put in but the quality of what happens in those hours that matters. I have seen talented individuals who work all day and all night, and they’re still not as effective as those who come in early and leave early so they can have time with their family, preserving their health and maintaining their balance. Science shows that you’re at your most effective when you take breaks, nourish your body, exercise, meditate–whatever feeds your body and spirit makes you better at work. Don’t run yourself ragged, neglecting your family, friends and health. You’ll end up with nothing.

    Mistake #5: Going after a title instead of preparing to fill a role.

    Those who are average go after titles instead of working to get the best results and become as effective as they can be. If you’re more concerned with titles and status than with substance, you could be sabotaging your success. Sometimes you have to take a step back to position yourself to take two steps forward. Focus on building the skills you’ll need for your next steps forward.

    Mistake #6: Burning bridges.

    This may be the biggest mistake of all. You never want to become that person of whom the HR person says, “Here’s a good example of how not to leave a job.” When you’re on your way out, it’s easy to get swept up in the excitement of wanting to tell everyone what you see as wrong and dysfunctional. But that short-term satisfaction can cost you in reputation. Most fields are a fairly small world, and there’s a good chance you’ll run into some of these people again. As the old saying goes, leave nothing behind but golden footprints.

    We all make mistakes. But be mindful of your mistakes, especially those that can harm your career. Pay attention to their patterns, and to what I call as a coach your leadership gaps. You can leverage them to your benefit, or you can let them damage your career and slow down your life’s work.

     


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post 6 Big Career Mistakes That Can Sabotage Your Future appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 04:29:21 on 2018/06/16 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , , Workplace   

    Want to Be Your Own Boss? Here’s What You Need to Know 

    If you have an entrepreneurial spirit, the odds are good that you long to be your own boss. It’s a sound aspiration, but there are few things you need to know going in. The key to doing well in the long term is to set yourself up for success right from the start, and these six principles can help you get there:

    Be determined. According to the US Small Business Administration, more than half of small business fail within the first five years. They fail for many reasons–most often not for a lack of desire, but because people shut down and leave when things go wrong. A determined person stays the course no matter what happens or what gets them down. Some people succeed because they are destined, but many more succeed because they are determined.

    Be disciplined. If you worked for someone else before working for yourself, you may have needed to be motivated and inspired by others. Now that you’re your own boss, you to learn to be a disciplined person with the right emotional state and mindset. Self-discipline is at the core of every successful person, the key to building a positive attitude toward time and personal management. Self-discipline is the most important quality you need to develop if you want to achieve success as your own boss.

    Become an expert. To become a boss you need experience, and becoming the expert in the company you are starting means that you need to be able to rely on your own knowledge and wisdom as you grow and run your business. Becoming an expert is making an investment in knowledge–the kind of investment that ends up paying the best interest.

    Be decisive. If you’re serious about being your own boss, you need to develop decisiveness. That means being specific and concise and timely when there’s a decision to be made. I believe it’s our decisions, not the condition of our lives, that determine how successful we will be. A true leader and great boss has the confidence to stand alone, the courage to make tough decisions, and the insight to realize that they are a product not of their circumstances but of their decisions.

    Build your network. It’s all but impossible to build a business on your own. That’s why you need to connect with as many influencers you can within your industry and field. You never know where business will come from, so it’s important that you continually engage in networking and make the right connections to excel and succeed.

    Build financial security. Great ideas are important, but to make those ideas successful, you need to be financially secure. A solid nest egg makes a big difference between starting a business and staying in business. There are many ways to build your financial security–saving your own money, seeking out investors, or even getting a loan. A successful entrepreneurial boss needs a financial cushion they can rely on. If you’re not realistic about your financial needs, your business won’t have a realistic chance of succeeding.

    The best part of being your boss is that the more you put in the more you get out. It may not always to be easy, but your success is right there in your own hands. There’s no other feeling like it.

     


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post Want to Be Your Own Boss? Here’s What You Need to Know appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 04:27:00 on 2018/06/16 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , Workplace   

    Everything You Need to Know About Great Leadership 

    Effective leadership can be thought of as a set of qualities and skills. Different leaders may have different makeups, different strengths and challenges. But there are certain traits that lie at the core of leadership–the qualities that all great leaders share.

    Developing the elements that make up leadership is a lifelong process. Start with these fundamentals and, as you grow into your personal leadership style, add others that fit. Then check in from time to time and see how well you’re progressing in each area so you can make a plan to keep growing and improving.

    Here are 16 traits and skills that are central to great leadership:

    1.    Clarity of purpose.

    The best leaders have to show all those they lead how their decisions align with the organization’s vision, goals, targets and ethics. Success demands singleness of purpose, and great leaders not only pursue it themselves but empower others to do the same.

    2.    Define tasks.

    Express what needs to be done with clarity and coherence. Once tasks are defined, give autonomy to the talented people you’ve hired and trust that the job can be done. The worst thing a leader can do is to micromanage the talented people they have hired. Allow people to do their job and excel at it.

    3.    Focus on goals and getting results.

    Understand the vision of the business or project and keep it at the forefront at all times. As a leader, you need to stay focused, prioritize and keep moving toward your goals. Commit everything you do to excellence.

    4. Act decisively.

    Decisive leadership avoids stagnation and vacillation. Know how to keep everyone moving forward on task with motivation and inspiration while also being responsible and adaptable to change and new information.

    5. Display confidence.

    The best leaders–the ones people truly respect–know how to lead with confidence. They take on new challenges while showing others that they’re not afraid of new roles or projects.

    6.  Have a positive mental attitude.

    A positive attitude gives you power over your circumstances instead of the other way around. Being a leader can be tough, and a positive attitude causes a chain reaction of positive thoughts and events. It’s a catalyst that fuels extraordinary outcomes. The best leaders know how to control how they feel and think. They understand that negativity exists within each of us but it’s our choice whether to foster it or not.

    7.    Are solution oriented.

    Every business, market and industry comes with its own set of problems and challenges. The best leaders are focused on solutions. They don’t get caught up on the details or blame others. When things don’t work out, they concentrate on the task at hand and do what is required to keep moving forward.

    8.    Demonstrate accountability.

    With great power comes great responsibility. The best leaders understand that there will always be failures and mistakes, and they take full responsibility for theirs and their team’s. The moment you take responsibility for everything is the moment you can change anything.

    9.  Invite genuine feedback.

    People need to be able to speak up and let their leaders know what they think. The best leaders don’t belittle those who disagree with them; they understand the importance of engagement, of speaking up and making a contribution.

    10.    Cultivate humility.

    Being a humble leader doesn’t mean you should hide your accomplishments. Humility is simply a willingness to be human, to admit to your inevitable mistakes and failings and encourage others to do the same.

    11.    Employ effective communication.

    When a leader is open and transparent in their alignment with company’s values, it ensures that communication–whether it’s upward to senior management or down the hierarchy to managed employees–is always consistent and without contradiction.

    12.    Take risks.

    Great leaders don’t allow their fear of consequences to prevent them from following their deepest instincts. They know creativity is about inventing, experimenting, growing, making mistakes and leading others forward.

    13.    Are willing to broadcast praise.

    It’s important to demonstrate that you care about your team and their success as a group. When employees perform well, recognize and acknowledge their achievements. Announce these achievements to the rest of the team, to senior management and, if possible, to your clients or customers, offering opportunities for positive reinforcement and role modeling.

    14.    Engage in active listening.

    Most leaders love to hear themselves speak, but great leaders show respect for others by paying attention to the person talking. They listen actively by restating information, and they offer subtle encouragement by nodding, smiling or leaning in to prompt the person talking to continue and elaborate on their ideas.

    15.    Motivate others.

    To motivate people, you have to engage them–not only their minds but also their hearts. Great leaders know that success isn’t just about what you accomplish in your life, it’s about what you inspire others to do.

    16.    Are constantly role modeling.

    Great leaders are great role models. They understand that if they want to achieve greatness, they have to first seek it in themselves and then set the example through the things they say and do–and when their words and deeds are aligned, others will want to emulate them.

    Leadership, at its best, is about relationships, teams, partnerships and motivating people to contribute. Cultivate creativity and excellence. Listen; seek new ideas and advice. That is the essence of great leadership.

     

     


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post Everything You Need to Know About Great Leadership appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 04:21:46 on 2018/06/16 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , , Workplace   

    4 Impressive Ways Great Leaders Handle Their Mistakes 

    All leaders make mistakes. To be human means to mess up once in a while. But the difference between good leaders and great ones lies in how they handle those mistakes.

    What are you modeling to those around you when you make a mistake? Your team will be watching, and what they see will affect their relationship with you and the level of trust they hold for you, so it’s important to get it right. Here are four simple but impressive ways you can demonstrate great leadership when you make a mistake:

    1. Acknowledge your mistakes.

    Never try to cover up or blame others for what went wrong. If you messed up, admit it and own it. It doesn’t have to be a big deal–simply acknowledge your responsibility and move on. Insecure leaders may be afraid of looking weak, but not admitting their mistake makes them look worse and costs them respect. I believe that in leadership, vulnerability is the ultimate strength. Admitting your mistakes earns you the respect of those you lead and makes your leadership human.

    2. Learn from your mistakes.

    Once you learn from your mistakes, don’t repeat them. As the old saying goes, when you repeat a mistake it is not a mistake anymore but a decision. The nature of great leadership lies in accepting risks, trying new things, and taking big chances, looking for the limits of what’s possible. And the best leaders know creativity often means breaking rules, making mistakes and learning along the way. Mistakes are among the greatest teachers, and working to understand your mistakes is one of the best forms of self-education. Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes; leadership is learning from them.

    3. Teach others from your mistakes.

    The times in our lives when we feel we have the least power can actually be the times we have the most–when we can affirm or redefine who we are and what we believe, and make choices that help others benefit from our experiences, good and bad. When you make mistakes, make a point of teaching others what you’ve learned. Doing so builds connection and trust. The best leaders are the great teachers, coaches, and guides who show us the way after they have been down that path.

    4. Move beyond your mistakes.

    Success is connected with action. Successful people keep moving; they make mistakes but don’t quit. Learn to use failure as a stepping stone away from the past. You don’t forget your mistake, but you don’t dwell on it or let it get you down. Get up and keep moving.

    Like all of us, you’re bound to make mistakes. But when you handle them well, they can help you be a better leader and a better person.

     


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post 4 Impressive Ways Great Leaders Handle Their Mistakes appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
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