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  • feedwordpress 08:00:55 on 2018/08/23 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , , Respect,   

    7 Things the Most Respected Leaders Do Every Day 

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    Everyone wants to be respected and admired, but often we are afraid of being perceived as too aggressive or overly confident in our pursuit of own greatness.

    While you can’t control other people’s opinions, you can always control your own actions. Respect takes time and effort—it’s not something you’re given but something you earn. Here are six top ways that the best leaders earn respect every day:

    They first give respect. Respected leaders know you must show respect before you can earn respect. They treat everyone with courtesy and kindness; even when criticizing or giving feedback, they’re always considerate and compassionate. As the saying goes, people will forget what you said and they’ll forget what you did, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel.

    They keep their promises. If they tell you they’re going to do something, you know you can count on them to get it done. For a leader to become known as a person who can’t be trusted is one of the quickest ways to engineer a loss of respect. The best leaders are always aware that people are counting on them, and they do everything they can to deliver on their promises and earn the respect of their people.

    They listen before speaking.
    The best leaders are typically the best listeners. Taking the time to listen instead of rushing in with an opinion shows that they’re confident in their leadership. It’s the insecure leaders who always have to speak first and signal that their thoughts are most important. Even in disagreement, everyone deserves to be heard—and a a true leader knows how to use listening, and silence, to their advantage.

    They ask for help. Most people see asking for help is a sign of weakness, but respected leaders are secure enough to admit they need help and view asking as a sign of strength. I always tell my clients that vulnerable is the new strong. It’s a smart leader who asks for help to learn and grow.

    They admit when they’re wrong. Most of us find it hard to admit when we’re wrong, but a respected leader is quick to say, “I messed up” or “I made a mistake” or “I was wrong.” It’s only the narcissistic, self-centered, egotistic leaders who they think they’re always right even when they are wrong—an attitude that costs them in respect.

    They serve others. Respected leaders know that nothing great can ever be accomplished alone. At its core, leadership is about serving others and inspiring them to bring out their own greatness. Great leaders inspire others by empowering and serving them.

    They appreciate others. The most respected leaders genuinely care about others and show admiration. These powerful traits show that they can see beyond themselves and have the emotional intelligence to celebrate others and boost the confidence and self-esteem of everyone around them. Leaders with a reputation for caring are among the most highly respected people anywhere.

    Lead from within: The well-respected leader knows respect is hard to attain but easy to lose.


    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

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    Additional Reading you might enjoy:


    Photo Credit: iStockPhotos

    The post 7 Things the Most Respected Leaders Do Every Day appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

  • feedwordpress 20:53:40 on 2018/06/11 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Respect, ,   

    6 Ways to Earn Respect as a Leader 

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    Respect and leadership go hand in hand. It’s a fundamental principle: To lead others, you first have to earn their respect. But it goes much deeper. Great leadership creates a climate of respect, an environment that sets high standards and supports everyone in doing their best.

    Unfortunately, there are no short cuts to respect. It has to be earned and maintained and nurtured. But there are things you can do to make sure you’re on track during the process. Here are some of the most important:

    Set an example. Respect is circular. To earn it, you have to give it. The respect you show to others not only models how you’d like them to treat you and each other but also reflects your own self-respect. The principle of respect should guide your actions every da

    Leave your ego behind. Ego is a social mask we wear when we have to play a role. It thrives on approval, control and power because it’s grounded in fear. Let go of worrying about how you’re perceived and whether you’re getting the credit you deserve. Focus on your mission and your team.

    Have consistency of character. When you’re consistent–when people know what to expect from you–they will be equally consistent in their respect for you and your leadership. Stay accountable and responsible and keep your words and actions aligned. Consistency is a commitment, but it’s a lot easier and more effective than faking it.

    Simplify the complicated. When you make things more complicated than they have to be, you sacrifice transparency and lose respect. When an issue is genuinely complex, pare it back to be as simple much as possible or break it up into smaller pieces. And when something is already simple, don’t allow it to unnecessarily grow into something more complex. Simplicity makes it much easier to be transparent, and transparency engenders trust and respect.

    Be trustworthy. Trustworthiness has two components­–doing the right things and doing things right. It’s the foundation of respect, central to any effective leader. Tell the truth, be open and thoughtful, and have the courage to do the right thing even when it’s not easy.

    Build respect into your communication. When you speak, the tone you use and the way you express yourself are almost as important as the words you say. Every element of your communication matters, whether it’s spoken or written, public or private. Be especially mindful of your tone–is it positive and respectful? Communicate with the utmost respect and you’ll find others doing the same for you.

    Remember, gaining respect isn’t something you can check off a list. It’s something you have to practice daily. But working to keep yourself in line with giving and gaining respect is one of the most important things you can do in leadership.



    N A T I O N A L    B E S T S E L L E R


    What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:


    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post 6 Ways to Earn Respect as a Leader appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

  • feedwordpress 10:08:00 on 2017/01/17 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , New Leaders, Respect,   

    21 Things New Leaders Should Do 

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    Screen Shot 2017-01-16 at 11.18.35 PM

    It’s easy to find lists of all the things that leaders shouldn’t do. Here are the positive steps you can take to build successful leadership.

    Especially at the beginning of a leadership journey, it’s easy to focus on all the things you’re not supposed to do—don’t be inaccessible, don’t play favorites, don’t build your authority on fear. And those things are important, but if you focus exclusively on the don’ts you may have a hard time moving forward.

    Here are 21 positive steps that will help you become the kind of the leader you can take great pride in, the kind people will honor with their followership.

    1. Keep tabs on expectations. As a new leader you shouldn’t take for granted your new title or your role for granted. Just because you are the leader doesn’t mean you have to have it all figured out.

    2. Grow your competencies and develop your skills. As a new leader studying every day is important, if you are doing just enough to get by, the day will come that it’s no longer good enough.

    3. Listen to learn. Odds are that many—if not all—of the people on your team know more about various aspects of the business than you do. As a new leader respect the expertise of others.

    4. Humility goes a long way. As a new leader humility is a skill that must acquired and practiced over and over again.

    5. Be the missing link. As a new leader recognize that although your team may be very capable, you were placed in that job for a reason. You bring a perspective that the team may lack. Know what it is, and make sure they know what it is too.

    6. Speak well of everyone. As a new leader, don’t badmouth upper management to your team or your team to upper management. It won’t score points with either side.

    7. Protect and shield. As a new leader guard your people from unnecessary hassles from upstairs or outside, and from any unnecessary drama.

    8. Ground yourself in trust. As a new leader make sure your people know that trust—giving it, earning it and building it together—is a top priority for the team.

    9. Gain a sixth sense. As a new leader tune into your perceptions enough to be able to walk into a room and sense the morale of the occupants.

    10. Know what is and isn’t important. As a new leader ignore trivial infractions and let them go unless they are linked to something bigger. Never ignore major violations.

    11. Be the meditator, the coach, the mentor: As a new leader act promptly to squelch dissension, disputes, discord and disagreements.

    12. Speak with candor. As a new leader avoid sarcasm, dishonesty, or gossip. Don’t let anything you say in the moment interfere with your reputation as someone who’s unfailingly candid, honest, and kind.

    13. Strive to build a workplace in which respect is the centerpiece. As a new leader it requires that you and everyone on your team focus on both giving respect and earning it.

    14. Make character matter. As a new leader make integrity and character the foundation of your leadership. Remember that you’re always leading by example.

    15. Measure your actions. As a new leader evaluate everything you do to determine whether you’re having the effect you want to. If you don’t already know, learn how to use data to better understand your wins and misses.

    16. Know what is urgent and what is not. As a new leader give a sense of urgency to tasks that are truly important. If you don’t convey it, how will they know?

    17. Be willing to admit you don’t know. As a new leader just because you are the leader doesn’t mean you have all the answers. When you don’t know, say so—then make it a point to inquire, study and learn.

    18. Treat everyone with courtesy. As a new leader treat people as you want to be treated.

    19. Stay focused on mission. As a new leader keep your mission at the front of everything you do, no matter what distractions and outside influences enter the picture.

    20. Have a low tolerance level for intolerance. As a new leader don’t EVER put up with bigots, bullies, bastards, weasels, snakes, swine, slimeballs or sleaze balls.

    21. Lead by example. As a new leader this is where your leadership will ultimately be measured. So lead by example always.

    Lead From Within: Before you are a leader success is all about growing yourself, when you become a leader success is all about growing others.

    The post 21 Things New Leaders Should Do appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

  • feedwordpress 12:41:07 on 2016/12/06 Permalink
    Tags: , , Humble Leaders, Humility, , , , , Respect, ,   

    The Best Leaders Are Humble Leaders 

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    screen-shot-2016-12-06-at-7-28-00-amWhen we think of great qualities of leaders, the first things that come to mind are traits like charisma, bravado and vision.

    You wouldn’t expect to see humility on that list—but you should.

    Research shows the effectiveness of humble leadership: Humble leaders have more influence, they attract better people, and they earn more confidence, respect and loyalty than those who rely upon ego and power.

    In my work as a coach, I emphasize not just the importance of humility but also the fact that it’s a skill.

    Here are some key skills of humble leaders. Look through and see which you already have and which you need to develop:

    They lead to serve. Humble leaders shift attention away from themselves and focus on the contributions and needs of those around them.

    They have reserves of inner strength. Being a humble leader isn’t a sign of meekness or powerlessness but of great inner strength. The best leaders are humble on the outside and confident on the inside.

    They admit to their mistakes. All leaders are human, which means they all make mistakes from time to time. When you are willing to share your own missteps and mistakes, it allows others to connect to you in a deeper way. Humility is a quality that lets others see your humanity.

    They seek input from others. The first step of turning to others for input is being vulnerable enough to admit that you need the help and insight of others—which is a sign of great character on its own.

    They know themselves. Humble leaders know who they are and behave in a way that’s consistent with that knowledge. They also recognize where there’s room for improvement.

    They are genuine. Humble leaders know the importance of being authentic. They are the same person in private, in public, and in personal life, in every situation and with every kind of people.

    They invite trust. Humble leaders know that trust—earning it, giving it and building it—is the foundation of great leadership.

    They treat others with respect. Humble leaders are consistent and disciplined in their treatment of others. They treat everyone with respect regardless of their position, role or title.

    They understand their limitations. Humble leaders have the confidence to recognize their own weaknesses. Rather than viewing their limits as a threat or a sign of frailty, they surround themselves with others who have complementary skills.

    They model the way. Humble leaders lead by example. Their leadership isn’t expressed as “because I’m the boss” authority but in every one of their actions and words.

    Lead From Within: There is always room to be a better person and leader. If you can cultivate humility as a skill, you will be strong when you are weak and brave when you are scared.

    Photo Credit: Getty Images





    The post The Best Leaders Are Humble Leaders appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

  • feedwordpress 12:59:22 on 2016/09/06 Permalink
    Tags: , Critical Leaders, , , Lessons in Leadership, , , , Respect   

    7 Effective Skills You Need to Survive the Critical Leader 

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    Screen Shot 2016-09-06 at 8.53.52 AMWe have all been there before: Working under a leader who is constantly criticizing, a boss who is quick to accuse and blame, a manager who is constantly disparaging the staff.

    It’s extremely hard to work with someone who’s always critical, finding fault and spooning out judgment. It creates a tense, untrusting environment and an adverse working culture.

    The first impulse is to walk away and move on to better things. But quitting isn’t always the best option—or an option at all.

    In those situations, there are still strategies you can employ to survive a critical leader.

    1. Decide that you won’t allow anyone to treat you in a way you wouldn’t treat yourself, or others. You don’t have to endure being humiliated, belittled, or otherwise emotionally abused. Recognize such behavior for what it is and make a commitment to yourself that you will not allow it.

    2. Draw a line. All healthy relationships have boundaries, but abusers are experts at crossing those lines. When you feel that someone has overstepped your boundaries, stand up for yourself boldly but respectfully. The moment you are uncomfortable is the moment to say something. It may be as simple as “I need to go now.” Don’t let things get out of hand, because that is how you set a precedent for acceptance and turn a one-time event into a chronic challenge.

    3. Propose a better plan. Trying to make sense of crazy will drive you insane. Instead have a plan for action that changes the circumstances. Alone or with others, you can schedule a time to sit down and let your leader know that your team needs a better form of communication. Try to work with them to develop a plan that treats accountability and responsibility as a two-way street.

    4. Remember that some people come into your life as blessings and others as lessons. Everything that happens to you, for good or for ill, carries a lesson. Even watching what others do wrong from a distance can teach you a lot. When you see and hear things you don’t like, look for the lessons you can learn from them.

    5. Let the things that irritate you about others lead you to a better understanding of yourself. You can also learn about yourself by watching those around you. Sometimes it’s the things we ourselves are guilty of that annoy us the most in others. And if you are in a position to lead or manage, ask yourself if your own behavior reflects how you’d like to see your team act.

    6. Be the change you want to see. You can’t control anyone else’s behavior, but you can always model what you’d like to see. Be mindful of how you react, respond, and reply, and make sure you don’t let yourself be influenced by the bad leadership you’re working under. Swim against the current with commitment and tenacity, and maybe your behavior will influence others.

    7. Respect yourself enough to walk away. If you have seriously given a bad situation every chance to improve—if you have done everything in your power to make it work, if you have talked, made a plan, became the change you want to see—there is one last thing you must decide.
    You may be past the point of trying to be honest and respectful with an emotional manipulator when everything you try to do is turned against you. If you’re doing yourself more harm than good, it’s time to respect yourself and walk away. There’s one kind of strength in surviving an emotionally abusive person, and another kind that comes from removing yourself from a toxic environment. The answer varies depending on the situation and how long you’ve been trying. Sometimes you have to ask yourself what will you allow to continue and what will you not.

    Lead from within: We must never make excuses for critical people, but we can learn to be better people in their presence.

    Additional Reading:

    For coaching, consulting, workshops and speaking. Please feel free to contact us.

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post 7 Effective Skills You Need to Survive the Critical Leader appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

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