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  • feedwordpress 11:04:39 on 2017/08/08 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , Optimism, Personal Development, Positivity, , ,   

    The One Time You Should NOT Express Positivity 

    Optimism and positivity are beneficial to leadership in almost every circumstance. You won’t find many who would dispute that thought.

    We know the best kind of leadership requires seeing the glass as half full. We know that even in the most challenging times and difficult circumstances, it’s important to concentrate on what we have rather than what we lack. We understand the importance of gratitude—not just as a response when things are going especially well but as a daily practice. It’s not that happy people are thankful, it’s that thankful people are happy.

    We know positive thinking and an optimistic attitude can actually change our reality for the better. In the words of the old adage, “Think good, and it will be good.”

    A daily practice of gratitude and positivity can benefit you even when things get so bad that you can’t see a good outcome or any seed of hope. You can assure yourself that even if you can’t currently comprehend it, there’s a lesson or a stubborn thread of grace in there somewhere.

    There’s one situation, however, when positivity and gratitude don’t work—when, in fact, they can actually be destructive.

    That’s when you try to apply them to others.

    It’s understandable, the urge to apply something so helpful to someone who’s hurting. But however well intended, it simply doesn’t work.

    A distraught or grieving colleague or client doesn’t want to hear “There must be something good in your life to be grateful for.” Or “It must have been meant to be.” Or “I know you’re disappointed but things work out for the best.”

    When someone is suffering, it’s cruel to suggest that it’s all a lesson designed to make them a better person. And it’s downright arrogant for us to tell them this is good for them, or that it’s the way it’s meant to be.

    Our job is not to philosophize about another’s pain, but to alleviate, relieve and lessen it.

    True leaders know that when they see someone suffering, there’s only one acceptable response. They roll up their sleeves and ask, ‘What can I do to help?

    Here are some ways you can be of service to someone who’s hurting:

    Listen. One of the most important traits in leadership is the ability to listen. The best leaders, the skillful ones, know the importance of listening more than they speak. It’s especially important to listen to people who are trying to make sense of difficult events.

    Show support. If someone’s going through a tough time, the most meaningful thing you can say is I’m here for you. Simple words, but when they’re backed up with action they share a burden—and they reassure the person that they’re not alone.

    Convey empathy. Adopting a human approach to your leadership sets an example that helps you build an entire culture of empathetic leaders. People will admire your approach and work harder for you knowing that you respect their personal needs.

    Connect with caring. Gone are the days when people expect leaders to sit behind a closed office door and dictate from power. The best leaders today get to know their people on a personal level as well as professionally. They care, and they show that caring by connecting, communicating and demonstrating compassion.

     Lead from within: A positive is not the best answer for every situation. As a leader, you need to let each situation involving one of your people bring forth the best of what you have to offer in the terms of how you listen, how you support, how you care and how you connect.


    Learn more about the gaps that exist in positivity in my National Bestseller book:
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     



    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post The One Time You Should NOT Express Positivity appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 11:10:04 on 2017/06/27 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Personal Development, teams, ,   

    The Story of Everybody, Somebody, Anybody And Nobody 


    Recently I told a group of leadership executives a simple but meaningful story that you may have heard before. It’s the story of four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.

    Here’s the story, titled “Whose Job Is It, Anyway?”

    There was an important job to be done. Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody’s job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn’t do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done.

    The story may be confusing but the message is clear: no one took responsibility so nothing got accomplished.

    It’s a story that plays out often in organizations and companies and on teams—anywhere there is culture that lacks accountability.

    But how do you get people to take responsibly for their work? Different things work in different situations, but here are some strategies that have proven to be effective:

    Become a role model. You can’t tell people what to do if you yourself aren’t willing to hold yourself to the same level. If you want people to act responsibly, you have to be accountable. Your team and your company look to you for direction.

    Don’t make assumptions. Don’t assume that others know instinctively what to do and when to do it, or even what you expect from them. Before people can take responsibility for their work they require clear communication. The more you communicate, the better the results are likely to be.

    Set the standard. If you expect excellence, it’s up to you to set the standards for results and performance. Make each task or goal measurable and set it on a reasonable timeline so it’s achievable. Give people a clear target and they’ll work to reach it—and maybe even surpass it.

    Get the buy-in to go the distance. You need people to buy in and commit if you want to succeed. Each vision should be compelling; each goal should build toward the whole; each task should be laced with motivation. You need people to feel compelled, inspired and motivated to take responsibility.

    Make regular check-ups. One of the biggest reasons people fall short is a lack of follow-through by leadership. Help people stay focused by setting up regular checkpoints—phone calls or meetings where everyone can communicate and catch up, staying focused on moving forward and being accountable. When people know there will be check-ups, they’re less likely to procrastinate and more likely to hit their targets.

    Provide support and training. Especially with a start-up or a new initiative, people are taking on projects or tasks that they’ve never faced before. Make sure everybody has the training and resources they need to be successful, and provide help in resolving any issues that may arise.

    Encourage candor. One of the worst things that can happen to a team is for people to feel uncomfortable discussing problems and expressing their honest opinions. Build a culture of candor so that people know it’s the norm to tell the truth, even when it’s difficult or awkward.

    Concentrate on solutions and not only problems. If people are having problems or falling behind, expect them to come to you with possible solutions, not just the problems. Create an expectation that the first response to a problem is to start finding solutions.

    Praise performance. Praise people for good results and be specific with your acknowledgment. Let them know what they did well and how their work is affecting others. If they fall short, coach them privately and let them know how they can improve. And if their performance does not improve, also address this with meaningful consequences that have been explained ahead of time.

    To avoid having your team become Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody, commit to becoming the kind of leader who takes responsibility for your own life and leadership.

    Lead from within: Don’t let Anybody (or Everybody, Somebody or Nobody) stop you from doing what you need to do to create the kind of leadership and life you can be proud of.
    Learn more about running great teams in my National Bestseller book:
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post The Story of Everybody, Somebody, Anybody And Nobody appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 09:14:41 on 2017/04/25 Permalink
    Tags: , Imposter, Imposter Syndrome, , , , , Personal Development, , , ,   

    How the Imposter in You Can Derail Your Leadership 

    Lead From Within, Lolly Daskal, Imposter Syndrome

    How many times in your life have you wanted to achieve something significant but were stopped by an inner voice?

    How many times in your leadership have you wanted to move to the next level but heard something inside saying, “No, you’re not ready”?

    These voice—the one that tells you you’re not good enough, smart enough, capable enough, worthy enough, or ready for the next step—is the voice of the imposter within you. The imposter wants to hold you back and prevent you from doing the things you dream about. It’s sabotaging you in the guise of protecting you.

    The imposter’s voice is the voice of fear—fear of vulnerability, fear of shame—and it will work to keep you from trying new things or taking bold action. Here are five ways the imposter can derail your leadership:

    The imposter compares. Most of us spend too much time looking over our shoulder to see how successful, how accomplished, how smart someone else is and how we measure up. There will always be someone who appears to be smarter, better, faster, wiser, leaner than you are. It can be exhausting trying to keep up with everyone, and comparing yourself to others leads to nothing but frustration. Measure your accomplishments within yourself. Don’t look at others but ask yourself daily what you can do better tomorrow.

    The imposter wants to please everyone. When you feel insufficient it’s a short leap to wanting to always please everyone, even though you know it’s impossible. Trying to please all is a no-win situation; leadership is not about pleasing people but empowering them—and that means sometimes pushing them to the edge of their discomfort zone. If you’re trying to please everyone you are doing harm to your leadership.

    The imposter is an overachiever. When your to-do list that is longer than you can manage, you need to step back. Delegate to the gifted and talented people you’ve surrounded yourself with. When you do, you help keep your own workload manageable and you empower others to lead and grow.

    The imposter is a perfectionist. There are few things more unhealthy than an either-or system in which you’re either perfect or a failure. Perfection isn’t real, and the sooner a leader knows that the less they will feel like an imposter. Don’t reach for perfection but concentrate doing your best to the best of your ability in a way that shows people that what you do you take pride in. Remember that your actions send a message to those you lead.

    The imposter feels like a fraud. The saying “fake it till you make it” is certainly popular. But it can be a damaging message. Pretending to be something else while you’re trying to figure it out isn’t authentic or genuine. Don’t fight the imposter by pretending that you deserve your success—learn to believe it, and then let the rest fall into place.

    Lead from within. The imposter within you will try to sabotage you and play havoc with who you are and what you can accomplish. The only effective way to combat it is to take full charge of your capabilities and competence and lead with confidence, because greatness lies within you.
     
    Check out my new book:
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    PRE-ORDER FREE ASSESSMENT


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:


    Photo Credit:
    Getty Images

     

    The post How the Imposter in You Can Derail Your Leadership appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 10:16:11 on 2017/04/18 Permalink
    Tags: , , , Personal Development, Rebel Leader, ,   

    Why Every Leader Should Have A Little Rebel Inside 

    The Rebel Within, Lolly Daskal, The Leadership Gap, To achieve something significant in the world, to have a meaningful influence, you need to be a rebel.

    A rebel knows how to challenge the status quo and make an impact.

    It’s the executive assistant who, frustrated by her nonresponsive boss, coordinates a meeting with the company’s vice presidents to help her develop a strategy for bringing about change.

    It’s the manager of a team raising money for philanthropic causes who asks his team members to consider not only raising money but also giving and working toward the cause themselves.

    It’s the security guard who, when his ideas for improved internal security are ignored by management, sets aside some of his personal time each week to teach and guide employees on the importance of security.

    Every leader—no matter what position or title—has a rebel within. The question is how healthy or repressed your rebellious side is. Here are ways to recognize the rebel within:

    A rebel has strong convictions. A leader who stands strong in their convictions creates an environment of certainty for everyone. When you are absolutely convinced that your decisions and principles are the best choice, you inspire others to follow you, and they in turn will absorb those beliefs and make them their own.

    A rebel has inner confidence. To be a great leader requires confidence. Rebels demonstrate a strong sense of self-assurance, so people gravitate to them and anticipate that great things are in store. This high level of confidence comes from an inner passion to make meaningful things happen in a way that creates a real difference.

    A rebel is a disruptor. A rebel never considers the status quo acceptable; they have an inner need to change things up. But they do it with a purpose: to make things better for others. They’re mindful that how they lead as very important as what they set out to do. When you lead by example, inspiring and influencing with your actions and words, others tend to trust them and admire you. Rebels disrupt people as well as things—they want people to know greatness lies within them.

    A rebel knows their strengths and skills. Unfortunately, many people in positions of leadership and authority lack the capacity to truly lead. They are not credible, trusted or respected, and they don’t have the command to influence others. But rebels are aware of their strengths and lead with them. A commitment to continuous learning, growth and evolution keeps leaders rebellious and wise.

    A rebel has influence and impact. Influence grows when you cede power without being forced to, when you care for others without being required to, when you empower others because you want to, when you serve others because you choose to. This kind of drive grants rebels tremendous influence and impact. They have a way of persuading people to do what they want.

    A rebel is a trend spotter. Rebels are always planning and creating and thinking about what comes next. They’re gifted at connecting the dots between strategic priorities and peoples’ work, organizational problems and opportunities. They earn respect because they’re good at coming up with ideas and plans and equally adept at making things happen—not only for themselves but for the greater good.

    A rebel is passionate about a cause. Rebels lead from extreme passion for a cause. Their focus is almost exclusively on others and how to serve them. One of the reasons rebels are so effective as leaders is that people understand that what drives them at heart is a cause bigger than themselves.

    Lead from within: Rebels are those who know the why’s of their life, so they can bear all the hows of their leadership.

    Check out my new book:
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    PRE-ORDER FREE ASSESSMENT


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:


    Photo Credit:
    Getty Images

    The post Why Every Leader Should Have A Little Rebel Inside appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 09:00:42 on 2017/04/11 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , Personal Development, ,   

    6 Excellent Reasons Most Leaders Are Not Qualified to Lead 

    The Leadership Gap, Lolly Daskal

    Every day, people are promoted into leadership who are completely unqualified to lead. People are placed in a leadership role because they’re a good performer who’s overdue for a promotion or because they act the part—even though they’re completely unequipped to motivate or coach people. Or the board selects a CEO who excels at processes and procedures but doesn’t connect with people.

    In most cases, a leadership role requires an entirely different set of skills and aptitudes than the work that got them there. Maybe that’s why a Gallup report found that companies pick the wrong managerial candidates 82 percent of the time—a frightening statistic, since managers have the greatest impact on employee engagement.

    My work as a leadership coach and business consultant often brings me into contact with leaders who are unqualified to lead, here are six excellent reasons why this is true:

    1. Power and authority don’t qualify. While unqualified leaders try to gain authority from titles, successful leaders earn authority by establishing mutual trust and accountability among colleagues. Leadership is not a title but a behavior.

    2. Processes doesn’t motivate. Some people love designing processes and procedures, and every organization needs people with that expertise. But successful leaders focus on people, not processes. How things work is less important than who makes them work.

    3. Explanations don’t engage or empower. The worst leaders will tell you how things should be done simply because they believe they know best. The best will navigate the way and then guide your journey. True leaders are selfless and consider it a privilege to serve and connect with others.

    4. “My way or the highway” doesn’t inspire. Leadership requires courageous thought and innovative creativity; it prizes inclusion and diversity. But an unqualified and insecure leader is likely to be rigid and cautious in their thinking and value obedience and conformity in their team.

    5. Competence doesn’t communicate. The most important element of leadership is communication and connection, drawing people in. When a worker is promoted into leadership because of their competence in a particular area, they may have no clue about the interpersonal requirements of their new position. It’s understandable that they’d just want to close their office door and do what they know how to do.

    6. Success can’t happen in a silo. An unqualified leader with a sudden promotion is likely to be more invested in their own success story than in the people around them. But successful leaders know true leadership becomes ineffective, if not impossible, without teamwork and respect for other people.

    It’s possible for even the most unqualified leader to succeed if they’re willing to let go of old patterns and undertake a lot of new learning.

    Lead from within: True leadership lies in guiding others to success and ensuring that everyone is performing at their best, doing the work they are pledged to do and doing it well, by unleashing their greatness and minding their gaps.

    Check out my new book:
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    PRE-ORDER FREE ASSESSMENT

    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post 6 Excellent Reasons Most Leaders Are Not Qualified to Lead appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
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