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  • feedwordpress 08:00:16 on 2019/09/19 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Life Skills, Listen, , , ,   

    7 Important Habits of Leaders Who Know How to Listen 


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    Great leaders must be effective communicators. That means they have to know how to speak and write clearly—and it also means they also have to know how to listen. Most of us don’t think of listening as a communication skill, but it’s one of the most important. The best leaders are skilled at listening—here’s how they do it:

    They listen with full attention. Most people like to speak, but it’s far more rewarding to listen with your full attention. You retain more, and people talk more—because the sincerest form of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.

    They listen to learn. In most exchanges, people simply react to the latest comment — a logical and often effective approach. But the best leaders are listening to learn. They don’t track conversations as a back-and-forth but as a path to new information. Listening, learning and putting into practice what you’ve learned will always be the best way to build success.

    They listen to understand. Most people listen with the intent to reply in the front of their mind. But true leaders know that in order to empathize and connect with others, you have to first understand them, and that understanding comes from good listening.

    They listen without interrupting. Most leaders have a genuine desire to be helpful, so it’s always tempting to chime in when someone’s speaking. But when you jump in to be helpful, you’re actually robbing them of the chance to fully express themselves and solve the problem on their own. Instead of rushing to respond when someone else speaks, try to zero in on what they’re actually saying. You can always offer help later if it’s still needed.

    They listen to form connections. The best listeners have developed their ability to hear and form connections—and then articulate the connecting points. When you listen and you are able to form connections with what is being spoken, you’ll find you’re well prepared to help people put their thoughts in context and decide what to do next.

    They listen without needing to reply. If you want to be known as a great communicator, you have to learn how to listen without thinking about your reply. As the old saying goes, we have two ears and one tongue. Focus entirely on understanding what’s being said.

    They listen to silence. Sometimes the most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t said. Listen for awkward pauses, omissions, hesitation. When you do, you’ll become aware of things you haven’t heard before..

    The most successful people I know are the ones who do more listening than talking. Great communication is more about hearing others than it is about being heard yourself.

    Lead from within: When you really listen well, you’ll be able to engage more deeply with your team, colleagues and customers, and that is the sign of great leadership.

     


    #1  N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R

    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness


    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: iStockPhotos

    The post 7 Important Habits of Leaders Who Know How to Listen appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 08:00:16 on 2019/09/05 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Life Skills, , , , , ,   

    10 Phrases That Will Help You Handle a Micromanaging Boss  


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    If your boss is a micromanager—the kind who wants to maintain as much control over you as they can—you know how frustrating and irritating it is. It’s possible, though, to take back some control—and these phrases can help you make that happen. Use them to start an effective dialogue that can result in more autonomy and less micromanagement:

    I’m going to do everything in my power to make you look good. If you tell your boss you want to make them look good, there is no reason for them to hound you. Accustomed to resistance, most micromanagers will be glad to hear something positive.

    Your success is important to me. Feed the ego of your micromanager and let them know their success matters to you. Their controlling tendencies are likely to ease if they believe your mind is on them—as they want it to be.

    Tell me how you like the work to be done. You may be able to circumvent a hovering micromanager by getting all the information up front. It will help you do the job you are supposed to do while also meeting their expectations.

    I will do an excellent job for you. When you reassure a micromanager about the quality of your work and show them that excellence is important to you, you may be able to put their perfectionist mind at peace.

    I know you want to help me succeed. Disarming a micromanager is important, and labeling their negative action into something positive may have them agreeing with you. Thank them and let them know you appreciate their investment. The recognition will make them feel good about themselves and it may help them give you some peace.

    I value your guidance. This is another way of disarming the micromanager with a positive twist. If you acknowledge their counsel, you may be able to persuade them that you will come to them when you need them.

    You sometimes know things about the situation that I don’t. This phrase feeds the micromanager’s ego and lets them know that you acknowledge their higher position and that you’ll check in when you need to know more.

    All the hovering, adjustments and changes are affecting my productivity. If nothing else is getting through, tell the truth and be straightforward. Leaders are measured by how much their team achieves. They know that productivity issues reflect poorly on them.

    I am going to show you how I do it on my own. Give the micromanager a rest by walking them through your own processes, showing them your competence and care.

    I am always open to your feedback. Holding yourself open for your micromanager to teach, guide, and mentor can help keep your work relationship on the plane where it belongs.

    A leader who’s constantly looking over their employees’ shoulders can inspire a lot of second-guessing and paranoia, and ultimately ends up running away their most talented people. To stop the micromanager—or at least get them out of your hair—try each of these approaches in turn until the situation is under control.

    Lead From Within: Most people don’t take well to being micromanaged because it leads to a loss of control and autonomy. But there are steps you can take before you decide to leave.


    #1  N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R

    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness


    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: iStockPhotos

    The post 10 Phrases That Will Help You Handle a Micromanaging Boss  appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 08:00:24 on 2019/08/27 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , Life Skills, ,   

    How to Avoid Distractions and Focus on What Matters 


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    Too many of us can’t remember the last time we were truly able to focus on a task without getting distracted. There is always something clamoring for our attention: the phone, notifications, emails, texts, people dropping in, on and on.

    If we give in to distraction, the harm goes beyond the immediate effects. Left unchecked, distraction can actually destroy our ability to focus. So how do we get back to a reality where we can reserve our attention for the things that will help us meet our goals?

    Here are some effective ways to overcome distraction and focus on the things that matter:

    Identify what’s important. Before you can stop being distracted you have to understand your priorities. When you have clarity about the things that matter, you have clarity about the things that don’t.

    Start your day off right. Create a morning routine to give yourself structure and a sense of what you want to accomplish that day. A morning ritual not only starts your day off right but enables you finish the day off right.

    Create a day plan. Write yourself a timeline of tasks and events you want to accomplish for the day, laying out everything you need to immediately get to work on. I usually advise my clients to put these plans on an index card and to include five tasks or events that need to do that that day.

    Prioritize your list. Look at what is important and what is urgent. Use the Eisenhower box. Developed by Dwight Eisenhower—who was not only a two-term US president but also a five-star general and president of Columbia University—it divides tasks into four simple categories.

    In the top left corner, headed Important and Urgent, you might put things like crises, deadlines, and problems.

    The top right corner, Important and Not Urgent, could consist of things like relationships, planning for long-term projects, and recreation.

    The bottom left corner, Not Important and Urgent, might consist of interruptions, meetings, and activities.

    The bottom right corner, Not Important and Not Urgent, might consist of time wasters, pleasant activities, and trivial tasks.

    The Eisenhower box helps prevent a common misstep in daily planning. Most of us default to doing urgent tasks first, but we should instead keep our focus on important tasks.

     Urgent tasks always come up, and there will always be more urgent tasks than you have time to accomplish no matter how hard you try. The only way to turn an important task into an urgent task is to give it a deadline.

    Establish boundaries. An effective way to avoid distractions is to let people know you are going to be offline, or you are not going to be answering emails, or your door will be closed and you won’t be accessible. Establishing these boundaries allows you to manage your time to focus, and it helps others manage their time by knowing when you are and aren’t available for routine concerns.

    Pace yourself. Learn to give each task your full attention: don’t rush or think you have to do it quickly because you have so much to get done. Every time you switch your attention from one task to another and then back again, there’s a cost.

    Stop overcommitting. The best way to make sure you have time for what matters is to stop saying yes to everything. The best leaders have perfected the art of saying no so they can say yes to what is important.

    Most people don’t know why they have no time to do the things that matter to them. Most of us are simply reacting to life, instead of responding to our priorities, and we become so accustomed to it that we don’t realize we are creating a reality we don’t even want.

     Lead from within: The way to concentrate on what matters is to get rid of the distractions that keep us away.

     


    #1  N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R

    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness


    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: istockphoto

    The post How to Avoid Distractions and Focus on What Matters appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 08:00:55 on 2019/08/06 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Life Skills, , , , ,   

    Make Sure to End Every Meeting with These 3 Things 


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    When you ask someone what they do for a living, it’s not likely that they’ll answer with “Well, I sit in meetings all day.” But when you look at the average businessperson’s schedule, it’s clear that meetings make up a substantial part of many jobs—especially for those in leadership.

    Meetings are often dismissed as a waste of time, but meetings that have a clear purpose and are well run can actually make things go more smoothly and save time.

    And what happens after those meetings is just as important.

    Dealing with meetings is a frequent topic in my work with hundreds of organizations as a leadership coach. I’ve devised a simple system to help my clients have the kind of meetings they need for the best results possible.

    An important part of that system is ending a meeting. Here are the three things you need to make sure you do before adjourning any meeting:

    Confirm key decisions. Make sure everyone is on the same page about any decisions that were made. It’s important that everyone comes away with a shared understanding, because it will help focus everyone to move in the same direction. You can ensure this by putting two quick questions to the group:

    • What topics did we discuss?
    • What decisions did we confirm?

    Agree upon next action steps. Have everyone agree upon next steps and what actions will be taken. Make it clear that you expect each step to be fulfilled as agreed upon, and that any changes or unforeseen obstacles need to be discussed as soon as they emerge. Ask the group these questions related to next steps:

    • What was agreed upon for next steps?
    • What are the deadlines?

    Create commitments. Be clear about the commitments and responsibilities that are made during the meeting so you can follow up by sending everyone involved a communication about the key objectives and actions items. The goal is for everyone to commit to accomplishing their tasks on schedule. Make sure to assign someone to check in at appropriate intervals to ensure that the commitments are being kept and, when necessary, re-evaluated in light of unexpected issues. These three questions ensure that commitments are understood:

    • Who is responsible for what?
    • How will we communicate this information?
    • Who will conduct follow-up?

    One of the biggest complaints I have from the leaders I coach is that they spend much too much time in meetings, leaving them with less time to do their jobs. But I’ve seen firsthand that a good system for meetings can limit distractions and keep everyone focused on what needs to get done so you get the results you want.

    Lead from within: Meetings happen whether we want them or not. It is what we do in our meetings that makes a difference, and with a smarter approach to meetings you can be an even smarter leader.


    #1  N A T I O N A L  B E S T S E L L E R

    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness


    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: iStockPhotos

    The post Make Sure to End Every Meeting with These 3 Things appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 08:00:50 on 2019/07/11 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Life Skills, , , , ,   

    7 Important Traits of the Leaders People Want to Follow 


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    Anyone can call themselves a leader. But not every leader is followed with admiration and respect. Many people are in leadership because they’ve been given a leadership position , but earning the title of leader is a different story.

    As a leadership coach, I have seen many people who have the stature, the title, the salary, and the corner office that says they’re the boss, but without the respect of their team. Their people don’t want to converse with them or follow them—and that means true leadership is missing.

    Leadership is about inspiring and motivating others do great things, and for me that’s the best test of effective leadership. To be a great leader isn’t easy—it means hard work and a daily commitment to serving others. This kind of leader isn’t easy to find, but here’s how you can recognize them:

    1. They have a character worth following. A leader who keeps their word, in good times and in difficulty, demonstrates integrity and high moral qualities. Their word is their bond and you know you can trust them in any circumstance.

    2. They embody inspirational courage. Leadership is not without its blunders and mishaps, and it takes a strong and solid individual to stay strong when the chips are down. When a leader maintains their dignity in times of deepest trouble, they inspire others to do the same.

    3. They give respect to earns respect. Most leaders expect to be respected, but the best leaders give respect first. They know the importance of honoring others, recognizing their talents and skills, and appreciating their contributions. A leader who gives respect will always get respect back.

    4. They’re there when they’re needed. Leadership carries big responsibilities, and it’s easy to become overly busy and preoccupied. But the leaders people trust, those who are in the know, are those who make the time to be available. They spend time with their most important asset—their people—to be the kind of boss people know they can talk to and rely on.

    5. They see things most people don’t see. It’s important to look past the details and process to open up room for vision and keep an eye on the big picture. Leaders worth following make it a practice to go beyond the status quo and look for the things that most people don’t see.

    6. They help people do things they didn’t think were possible. Even when we’re working at our best, many of us don’t get ever feel we’re growing into a better version of ourselves. The key is finding someone who believes in us. The leader who makes you feel and think you can do better—who knows you are better—is the leader you’re happy to follow wherever they lead. People will always step up to the plate to live up to a leader’s high expectations.

    7. They know their work is bigger than themselves. Most of us think of our sphere of influence in small terms. Great leaders are always thinking more widely—considering those around them and those beyond them. Leaders who think big help us climb out of the boxes we put ourselves into. They’re determined to make an impact on the communities where they live and work.

    Lead from within: You always want to be following a leader who makes you feel think and do things beyond your own scope of being.

     


    #1 N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R

    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness


    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Drawing by Lolly Daskal

    The post 7 Important Traits of the Leaders People Want to Follow appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
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