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  • feedwordpress 11:24:54 on 2017/08/22 Permalink
    Tags: Do it All, Fixer, Lead From Within, ,   

    It’s True — You Can’t Do It All 

    It can be hard to be a leader in today’s hurried business climate. People seem to expect a leader to know everything, be everything and do everything, all at the same time.

    But even if you can, that doesn’t mean you should.

    Great leaders know that deciding what not to do is as important as deciding what to do.

    Most leaders executives, bosses, managers run into trouble when they think they need fix it all, but frankly that’s impossible.

    In my new national bestselling book, The Leadership Gap, I highlight a big problem in leadership, the archetype, the leader I call the fixer, the fixer, is someone who needs to step in all the time and show they can do it all. they are constantly telling people what to do and how to do it without even waiting to see if people understand what they are saying or asking of

    So how do we leverage the fixer within ourselves:

    We need to fix the fixer: Before we can fix anyone, or anything we need to fix ourselves. Hire a coach or get a mentor, to help you get over the fact that you have to be the martyr, savor, of everyone and everything. deal with your inner demons. whatever they maybe, this may be the hardest part of healing yourself, its much easier said than done, because as human beings  we are complicated and as a fixer we want to simplify everything.

    Trust people to fend for themselves: As a leader helping other, you don’t allow them to fend for themselves, instead of always offering to rescue, solve, comfort, or defend. Learn to become a better listener than a leader who does a lot of talking. Become the kind of leader that’s compassionate and considerate, but don’t offer to take over someone else’s problems in order to make those problems go away. The best leaders empower others by just being there for them and listen with understanding.

    Don’t cross boundaries: How many times have you found yourself in situations and you ask yourself how did I get in so deep, I don’t even belong here. don’t allow yourself as a leader to get swallowed up in other people challenges or complications,

    Shield yourself from emotional hostage syndrome. Many years ago, I coined the phrase emotional hostage syndrome, when I started to notice some of my clients that I was coaching were feeling the things for another so strongly that they become hostage of their emotions. When you cannot separate yourself from another you lose perspective. In order to make sure you don’t lose perspective or a point of reference make sure you come from the right amount of apathy with a dash of empathy. Resist the urge to take on responsibility, where the responsibility belongs in the first place.

    If you have a tendency to be a fixer, a problem solver, resolver, decipher or decoder. I am saying you think about taking one little step back – will you still be the leader?

    The answer unequivocally is YES.

    People will still view you as leader. Maybe even with more respect than if you always were fixing their problems, solving their challenges.

    The best leader give the gift in others in trusting them and empowering them to solve their own problems, but letting them know that as leader you are standing right beside them and supporting them if they need you.

    John Quincy Adams said, if your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more you are a leader.

    Lead from within: At the end the best leaders don’t tell people how to do things, they support them and let them surprise you with their results.  Because as a leader its not necessarily the one who does the greatest things but it’s the one who gets the people to do the greatest things that is a great leader.


    Learn how to leverage the fixer within you in my National Bestseller book:
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     



    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post It’s True — You Can’t Do It All appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 11:04:39 on 2017/08/08 Permalink
    Tags: , Lead From Within, , , Optimism, , Positivity, , ,   

    The One Time You Should NOT Express Positivity 

    Optimism and positivity are beneficial to leadership in almost every circumstance. You won’t find many who would dispute that thought.

    We know the best kind of leadership requires seeing the glass as half full. We know that even in the most challenging times and difficult circumstances, it’s important to concentrate on what we have rather than what we lack. We understand the importance of gratitude—not just as a response when things are going especially well but as a daily practice. It’s not that happy people are thankful, it’s that thankful people are happy.

    We know positive thinking and an optimistic attitude can actually change our reality for the better. In the words of the old adage, “Think good, and it will be good.”

    A daily practice of gratitude and positivity can benefit you even when things get so bad that you can’t see a good outcome or any seed of hope. You can assure yourself that even if you can’t currently comprehend it, there’s a lesson or a stubborn thread of grace in there somewhere.

    There’s one situation, however, when positivity and gratitude don’t work—when, in fact, they can actually be destructive.

    That’s when you try to apply them to others.

    It’s understandable, the urge to apply something so helpful to someone who’s hurting. But however well intended, it simply doesn’t work.

    A distraught or grieving colleague or client doesn’t want to hear “There must be something good in your life to be grateful for.” Or “It must have been meant to be.” Or “I know you’re disappointed but things work out for the best.”

    When someone is suffering, it’s cruel to suggest that it’s all a lesson designed to make them a better person. And it’s downright arrogant for us to tell them this is good for them, or that it’s the way it’s meant to be.

    Our job is not to philosophize about another’s pain, but to alleviate, relieve and lessen it.

    True leaders know that when they see someone suffering, there’s only one acceptable response. They roll up their sleeves and ask, ‘What can I do to help?

    Here are some ways you can be of service to someone who’s hurting:

    Listen. One of the most important traits in leadership is the ability to listen. The best leaders, the skillful ones, know the importance of listening more than they speak. It’s especially important to listen to people who are trying to make sense of difficult events.

    Show support. If someone’s going through a tough time, the most meaningful thing you can say is I’m here for you. Simple words, but when they’re backed up with action they share a burden—and they reassure the person that they’re not alone.

    Convey empathy. Adopting a human approach to your leadership sets an example that helps you build an entire culture of empathetic leaders. People will admire your approach and work harder for you knowing that you respect their personal needs.

    Connect with caring. Gone are the days when people expect leaders to sit behind a closed office door and dictate from power. The best leaders today get to know their people on a personal level as well as professionally. They care, and they show that caring by connecting, communicating and demonstrating compassion.

     Lead from within: A positive is not the best answer for every situation. As a leader, you need to let each situation involving one of your people bring forth the best of what you have to offer in the terms of how you listen, how you support, how you care and how you connect.


    Learn more about the gaps that exist in positivity in my National Bestseller book:
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     



    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post The One Time You Should NOT Express Positivity appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 14:18:26 on 2017/08/07 Permalink
    Tags: , Joel Comm, Lead From Within, , , Reading,   

    Fun With Joel Comm and Lolly Daskal 

    Joel is the self-confessed ‘dumbest person in the room’ with today’s guest, author, and speaker, writer Lolly Daskal. Joel brings out Lolly’s inner girl and discusses her obsession for books and reading at least one book per day, sometimes before breakfast Joel discussed Lolly’s latest book: Leadership Gap – What Gets Between you and Greatness, and find out why this leadership book is different to others and how you can leverage a weakness into strength.

     

    LISTEN BELOW

     

    Find Lolly on her website
    Read Lolly’s latest book: The Leadership Gap Book : What gets Between You and Your Greatness

    The post Fun With Joel Comm and Lolly Daskal appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 09:00:41 on 2017/08/01 Permalink
    Tags: , Lead From Within, ,   

    Here’s Why You Can’t Afford to Just Stand By And Watch 

    We are living in difficult times, with dysfunction and great disruption seemingly at every turn.

    But there’s something to be learned in any situation. And our times now are asking us some important questions:

    Why we don’t have better leadership?

     Why is it we have leaders that disappoint and dissatisfy us?

    Why do we allow this to happen?

    An important part of the answer to these questions is this: We have become a society of bystanders.

    Bystanders don’t get involved. They stand by—exactly as the name says—and watch without helping.

    Bystanders see something but do nothing; they hear something but say nothing.

    Bystanders are created by fear.

    If you are acting out of fear you cannot be brave, and if you are acting out of passivity you cannot be courageous.

    It’s when we feel most powerless, when we feel nothing we can do will change the status quo, that we need to challenge our fear and passivity—to stop being afraid, to leave any passive inclinations behind.

    If you think you’re not playing a part in the dysfunction, think again. Anyone who is a bystander—anyone who’s watching without doing anything about the troublesome things they see—is part of the problem.

    Ask yourself if any of these traits describe you:

    You believe you’re not leadership material. Where are all the men and women who have strong vision and great ideas and are compelled for the greater good? Maybe you’ve let yourself believe you lack the power or the conviction or the skills to lead. If so, you need to start where you are and answer the call. You’ve never been needed more.

    You’re suppressing your awareness. It’s easy to become so distressed that all you want to do is disengage. If you’re dismissing the problem by checking out because it’s too much to deal with, you’re resigning yourself to apathy. It’s never made any problem go away—if anything it makes things worse. You can’t help yourself or others by ignoring reality. More than ever before we need leaders who can look squarely at the problems we face.

    You’ve stopped meeting the challenges. Suppose our companies, our organizations, our teams, our leaders, became stopped trying to meet our needs. The effects would be terrible. When we’re all facing more and more challenges, it’s tempting to take a break from doing the hard work of turning them around. Remember that you’re pacing yourself for a marathon, not a sprint, so you can maintain a steady effort every day.

    You’re scared to stand up for your convictions. To lead others requires integrity, a word whose Latin origins mean wholeness and completeness, and which in turn means consistency of character. You can’t lose your convictions or your courage when you’re fighting for a common purpose, and you can’t deny the truth you see in exchange for security or someone else’s agenda. Strong convictions precede great actions.

    It’s our duty not only to meet these standards ourselves but to hold others in leadership to them. When a leader becomes lazy, self-indulgent, deceiving, or corrupt, we have to take action and challenge their power.

    Here’s why you can’t afford to just stand by and watch because true leadership is about people: people before policy, people before profits, and people before procedures.

    If we allow those we don’t respect to lead and those we don’t trust to have influence, we are acting out of fear and living as bystanders. And that’s not going to cut it anymore.

    Leadership at its heart is about we the people, it’s not about a self-serving agenda.

    There is a deep cry, a true plea for leadership. We are looking for leaders who will hold themselves accountable—to humanity, to character, to virtue.

    If you want to make an impact, there’s no better time. Now is your chance.

    There is a gap in our leadership and we need you to fill it. We need to you say something and do something.

    We are looking for those who have been bystanders to stop being fearful, to take a chance and challenge the status quo. If you are waiting for permission, here it is. If you are waiting for approval, we approve.

    We are looking for you… to lead us with heart.

    Lead from Within: Leaders become great not because their power, but becasue of their ability to empower others.

     

    Learn more about the gaps that exist in my National Bestseller book:
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     
    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post Here’s Why You Can’t Afford to Just Stand By And Watch appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 18:26:22 on 2017/07/21 Permalink
    Tags: Cheddar TV, Lead From Within, ,   

    CHEDDAR TV: What It Takes To Be A Great Leader 

    The post CHEDDAR TV: What It Takes To Be A Great Leader appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
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