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  • feedwordpress 08:00:17 on 2018/09/20 Permalink
    Tags: , HR, , , , ,   

    How to Stop Thinking Like an Imposter 

    The imposter syndrome is real and relevant.

    All of us at some point or another question our capabilities and competence. It’s easy to start down the path of wondering how you got hired or promoted over others and end up  waiting for people to discover how little you know or how lacking your skills are.

    It can happen to anyone—especially the smartest and most successful—but we live with our thoughts and have to be careful what we tell ourselves. And if you say too many self-effacing things out loud, you project a lack of confidence. Both the internal and external voices can do damage, and you need to shut them down.

    Here are the most common forms of imposter thinkingsee which are the most familiar to you and learn how to pivot your thinking.

    “I’m not as capable as they think I am.” This thinking is damaging not only to your self-esteem but also to your professional relationships. Think back to the last time someone in your workplace made a mistake or didn’t know an answer. Unless it’s a truly toxic environment, it’s unlikely that they were shamed and made to feel inferior for it. Trust your abilities, understand your limits and work to always know more.

    “I got this position because I was just in the right place at the right time. Someone else would do a better job.” Remind yourself how you got the job. If you were hired from outside, think about how hard you worked to prepare for the interview and how many people you beat out. If you were promoted, remember how hard you worked to earn it. Even if you were in the right place at the right time, don’t forget the unspoken part of that equation—you were there with the right preparation and the will to make it happen.

    “I don’t really like talking about it when I get a promotion or receive some kind of recognition.” Discomfort with being recognized for your accomplishments can stem from a sense of unworthiness—it’s not about the recognition but how you feel about yourself. Instead of dwelling on what you do and don’t deserve, focus on accepting what you have to offer and finding ways to use it productively.

    “I only got the assignment because everyone else was too busy.” Imposter syndrome can prevent you from seeing yourself as special in any way. You may be constantly telling yourself and others, “Oh, that was nothing. I’m sure anyone could have done it.” When this thinking strikes you, focus on doing your absolute best. Sure, lots of people can hit a baseball, but you’re the one who actually stepped up to the plate.

    “My success is nothing but luck.” If you attribute your accomplishments to luck, you may fear that you won’t be able to continue your success, which ties in to the idea that your achievements have nothing to do with your  competence or capabilities. Luck does play a role in every success story. If you’re reading this, for example, you’ve had access to education and technology—which puts you ahead of many people right out of the gate. Be grateful for your good fortune, but recognize too that what you’ve done with those gifts is equally important in your success.

    “It’s all my fault this didn’t turn out right.” Perfectionism and impostor syndrome often go hand in hand. The only cure for perfectionism is to remind yourself—as often as it takes—that perfection is a myth. If you’re human, you’re imperfect. Give yourself a break, acknowledge your imperfections, celebrate your wins and work on the things that you want to improve.

    “It’s all been a mistake.” The feeling that your success is in error is another way of discounting your own abilities and efforts. To help take ownership of your achievements, deconstruct them and think about all the learning and hard work that went into them. Those weren’t mistakes.

    Lead from within: The imposter within you has to start believing in yourself and stop thinking about what others are achieving if you want to succeed.

     


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: iStock Photo

    The post How to Stop Thinking Like an Imposter appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 08:00:45 on 2018/09/18 Permalink
    Tags: , , HR, Important, , , , ,   

    10 Ways to Make Your Team Feel Appreciated and Important 

    Whatever we learned about leadership even a decade ago is outdated. Under the old model, leaders made all the decisions and the rest of the team went along.

    Today the concept of employee empowerment is changing the game. Giving front-line employees the authority to make decisions once reserved only for managers and leaders brings them a sense of ownership and gives consumers the experience of a responsive, caring organization.

    Here are some ways to make your team feel appreciated and important under the new model:

    Offer them safety. People will entrust their future only to someone they consider reliable; they want to know they can count on someone trustworthy, someone who will have their back when things go wrong . if you want to empower your people make them feel safe.

    Speak with kindness. It takes wisdom and determination to lead others not through power and authority but by inspiring and motivating them with words that are both truthful and kind. Kindness makes anyone feel valued and respected.

    Accept them for who they are. We have an all-too-human inclination to judge others, and overcoming it can be difficult. But the best leaders are those who don’t judge but unconditionally accept others, with all their strengths and weaknesses. It’s an approach that raises people’s self-esteem, reinforces their self-image and makes them enthusiastic members of the team.

    Demonstrate that you trust them.  Let them make decisions that matter and can impact the company. Verbal appreciation is important, and bonuses and other perks are always welcome—but ultimately, showing someone that you trust their opinion and expertise is the most valuable form of appreciation you can give.

    Be available and accessible. Adopting an open-door policy shows that you care about your team by being available and accessible enough that  they can always come to you with their input and insights. Let them know their opinions are valued and appreciated. Whether you regularly walk around or simply leave your door open, show your team that you’re there for them.

    Appreciate their efforts. Many leaders appreciate people for obtaining results, but the best kind of leader appreciates people for their effort. Letting your team know they’re doing a great job will not only ensure they continue to produce high-quality work but also increase their satisfaction.

    If you want to speed processes and still produce quality materials and services, focus on making your team feel appreciated and important. In return, they will reward you with hard work and loyalty.

    Lead from within: Leadership at its core can make or break teams. As a leader, you have the power to make people feel important and appreciated or overlooked and ungrateful. It’s your choice.

     


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: Getty Images

    The post 10 Ways to Make Your Team Feel Appreciated and Important appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 08:00:51 on 2018/09/17 Permalink
    Tags: Extraverts, HR, Introverts, , , , , ,   

    How to Be Great at Managing Both Introverts and Extroverts 

    As an executive leadership coach, my job often involves helping extroverts understand introverts and vice versa.

    We tend to think of these categories in terms of whether people are outgoing or shy, but it’s more complex than that. Here are some of the basic differences:

    Extraverts have a tendency towards external processing and outward expression.
    Introverts have a tendency towards internal experiences and inward reflection.

    Extraverts gain energy from being with others.
    Introverts often feel drained when they spend too much time with others, particularly strangers.

    Extraverts get bored and restless if they spend too much time alone.
    Introverts look forward to time alone to recharge their batteries and restore their energy.

    Extraverts tend to be very aware of what and who is around them.
    Introverts often don’t pay much attention to their surroundings.

    Extraverts figure things out best by talking them over with other people.
    Introverts need time alone to think things through and get in touch with their inner selves.

    Extraverts find it easy to get through a first draft when writing a report.
    Introverts have a hard time getting started because they want their ideas to be well thought out before they commit to putting anything on paper.

    Extraverts tend to speak first and think later, and are likely to put their foot in their mouth.
    Introverts often walk away wondering, “Why didn’t I think to say that?”

    To help extraverts excel, allow them to express themselves as they think things through. Be appreciative of their creative and innovative thinking, listen to their many ideas, let them multitask, and respect their independent nature. Make good use of their attentiveness and interpersonal skills.

    To help introverts to excel, give them time—time to think, time to speak, time to make decisions. Respect their private nature and their need to work alone. Let them learn at their own pace and have time alone to process and think. Give them information in increments so they can digest and rework it in their heads. Make good use of their thorough, deliberative nature.

    Of course, these categories are generalizations, and few people fit squarely into either. Leaving room for individual variation, it can be helpful to recognize the differences in the way extraverts and introverts think, work and achieve. Letting every member of your team find their own sweet spot allows everyone to excel on their own terms.

    Lead from within: As a leader, you have to be able to get along with all kinds of people, bridging the gaps in personalities and relationships and connecting your team members with the work and environment that will help them excel.


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Art by: Lolly Daskal

    The post How to Be Great at Managing Both Introverts and Extroverts appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 08:00:51 on 2018/09/13 Permalink
    Tags: , , HR, , , , ,   

    6 Things Leaders Hate Doing but Need to Do Anyway 

    As an executive leadership coach, I work firsthand with a wide range of leaders, which gives me a good perspective on the things they have in common. Here are six things that virtually every leader I’ve ever worked with does regularly, even though they thoroughly dislike them. If you’re trying to skate by these (or other important things you don’t enjoy), get in the habit of doing them anyway.

    Being vulnerable. Three decades ago, I came up with the phrase Vulnerable is the new strong. Many of my coaching clients disagreed and argued that vulnerability is in fact weakness. I thought then, and still do, that if you show vulnerability, people will respect you more, honor you more and relate to you more. I’m glad to say that most of those who reluctantly went along later came around to agreeing with me.

    Managing. Most leaders want to be the visionary, the one who thinks up the great ideas. Nobody wants to manage the visions through implementation. But the truth is, you cannot become an excellent leader without also knowing how to be an excellent manager. Any leader who is not a good manager risks having their vision and their team compromised by the mismanagement of others.

    Giving feedback. Sharing constructive criticism is a big part of being a leader. If you can’t help people rethink what they’re doing, you’re not truly leading them. People need feedback—they need to know if what they are doing is right or if they need correction. Feedback is a valuable tool that provides direction. Given the right way, it becomes a gift.

    Admitting to mistakes. All great leaders make mistakes along the way, but not many want to admit it. It takes a lot of coaching for some leaders to be able admit when they’re wrong, but the power of admitting to your mistakes is the power of your influence as a leader.

    Exercising self-restraint. I’ve seen leaders who wanted to have a go at their team, their board, their stakeholders—to tell them all what they think and how they feel. But I always coach leaders not to mix bad words with a bad mood. You’ll have many opportunities to change your mood, but you can never replace the words you speak. So even if you hate it, learn self-restraint when it comes to your emotions and make sure the words you speak are intentional and thoughtful.

    Failing. Leaders aren’t perfect; they have weaknesses, shortcomings and failures from time to time. Nobody likes failing. Period. Leaders, in particular, want to be known as winners. But most leaders will tell you that even though they hate failing they continue to take risks, because some of their greatest achievements, most memorable growth and most effective improvements have come from their failures.

    Lead from within: There will be many things you don’t want to do as a leader. Do them anyway.


     

    N A T I O N A L    B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: iStockphotos

    The post 6 Things Leaders Hate Doing but Need to Do Anyway appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
  • feedwordpress 08:00:46 on 2018/09/11 Permalink
    Tags: HR, , , , , ,   

    How to Dramatically Increase Your Influence as a Leader 

    Ultimately, all leadership is about influence. It’s the single most important factor in your impact.

    So how do you create influence? It begins with self-improvement—making an investment in your own abilities and adaptability—a commitment to keep growing and learning. That example is one of the most influential things you can practice. Here are some other ways to dramatically increase your influence with your people.

    Provide opportunities for wins. Create circumstances that give your people a series of small wins that will magnify their potential. When challenges are mastered and opportunities turn into wins, people admire the leader who has helped them stretch.

    Believe in your people. There is no greater empowerment and support you can give someone than to look them in the eye and with sincerity and conviction say, “I believe in you.” When you believe in someone, they can achieve the impossible.

    Serve others before yourself. The best use of your time and leadership is to lose yourself in the service of others. You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do. The growth and development of people represent the highest calling of leadership.

    Give trust so you can earn trust. Experienced leaders know that the best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them first. Trust is the glue of leadership, the foundational principle that holds all relationships together. Teamwork builds trust and trust builds growth.

    Think bigger for others—even bigger than they think of themselves. There is no more noble occupation in the world than to help another human being succeed. Leaders make their people better, helping them to go higher than they could have by themselves.

    Truly connect with people. Leaders are responsible for connecting with their people and relating to them in a way that increases their own influence. When you can connect with people, you can begin to form relationships—and relationships are the basis of influence.

    Invest in the success of others.  The more you invest in people and lift them toward their potential, the more likely they are to view you as their leader. Leadership is not about titles, positions or flow charts but one life influencing another. True leaders bring out the personal best in those around them.

    Extend honor to receive respect. Influence doesn’t come to us instantaneously; it increases gradually. It grows as we purposefully take action by extending honor and receiving respect from others in return.

    Lead with character. It’s long been said that you want to test someone’s character, give them power. Leading with character means doing what’s right, however hard it is. Example is not the main thing in influencing others—it is the only thing. People will follow you when you exhibit strong character and integrity.

    Lift people up. Always show kindness and attention to others. Your words might be filling the empty places in someone’s heart. It does not matter who is assigned to your team; what matters is who they will become because of you.

    Lead with authority but allow autonomy. The key to successful leadership is influence, not authority. Leaders must be close enough to relate to others but far enough ahead to motivate them. If you truly want people to respect you as a leader, you must prove to them they can survive and thrive even without you.

    Lead from within: Leaders should influence others in such a way that it builds people up, encourages and edifies them so they can duplicate this attitude in others.

     


     

    N A T I O N A L   B E S T S E L L E R
    The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness

    After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.

    buy now

     


    Additional Reading you might enjoy:

     

    Photo Credit: iStock Photos

    The post How to Dramatically Increase Your Influence as a Leader appeared first on Lolly Daskal.

     
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